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Key items to help make a widow’s life a little easier

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The Ultimate Survival Guide for New Widows

These 10 items will make your transition easier

by Laurie Burrows Grad

August 24, 2016

“Sorry widowers, this one’s for the ladies.

When Peter died, I had to face the practical aspects of living alone. I had to change light bulbs, hang pictures and open jars by myself. So I devised a list of key items for widows to keep on hand to make their lives easier.  Here are 10 of them:

1. A secure step ladder: A woman who lives alone surely needs a secure step ladder. Invest wisely and use your coupons at Bed Bath & Beyond to get the top-of-the-line ladder. Be honest. How many times have you stepped on a chair instead of a step ladder and almost taken a nose dive? More than one I bet! Be safe please!

2.  Tap lights: I live in Los Angeles where earthquakes are common so I always keep a tap light in every room of the house in case of a power outage. They also double as great toddler toys.

3. A screw driver: This item is a must for every household but particularly helpful for single women. Color me so proud. I just put my new license plates on my car by myself with this nifty little sucker.

4. EZ Moves Furniture Moving System: When you have to move heavy furniture, simply lift, place, and slide the item. It’s a dolly that doesn’t take up space and can be used for a variety of household chores. OK, it doesn’t help with my bad back, but just think how you can keep your chiropractor in business? (In the interest of truth, I have never used it, but it does look great in my garage).”

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Rockers prove you’re never “Too Old to Rock ‘N’ Roll”

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Rolling Stones perform Desert Trip
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On October 7th, legendary rockers Mick Jagger (73) with the Rolling Stones and Bob Dylan (75) kicked off a three-day music festival, The Desert Trip, in California. Saturday featured Paul McCartney (74) and Neil Young (70).  Roger Waters (73) from Pink Floyd and The Who (Roger Daltrey, 72 and Pete Townsend, 71) played on Sunday. Rolling Stone magazine writer Steve Appleford reported the “festival’s unprecedented musical summit…is a gathering of historic headliners with rich catalogs of hits and groundbreaking work that has influenced several generations of music-makers. All the players at Desert Trip remain among the top live acts, despite time and age that have left many of their contemporaries behind.”  Read more

“‘Tonight we’re not going to do any age jokes or anything, OK? Welcome to the Palm Springs retirement home for gentle English musicians,’ Jagger joked early on of the fest that has been called ‘Oldchella’ and worse. He was prepared to prove otherwise.”

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A box marked “personal” and accomplishing life goals

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Have you accomplished your life goals?

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Recently, I rummaged through a dusty old cardboard box marked “personal” looking for a couple of family obituaries I cut out of the newspaper years ago.  I wanted to add the obituary information to my online family tree.  In that old beat up box I found a faded, thin, pink booklet titled My Wonderful Mama written by my daughter as a young girl.  Inside the laminated, construction paper cover was near perfect printing in pencil on lined notebook paper.

The story told in this booklet began with a biography of me, followed by my “most outstanding memories (from) school” which included winning a number one rating in girls glee and in full choir at a state-wide competition.  It included my worst school subject (geometry) and my favorite (social studies).

The handwritten page in that little brad-bound booklet which struck me the most was the page she wrote about my “many goals as an adult.”  My daughter wrote, “They are:

  1. To make the world a better place for kids.

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  2. To advocate for kids.
  3. To hold public office.
  4. To improve public education.
  5. To get a college degree.
  6. Have a family and be a great mama.
  7. To be a great gardener.
  8. To have a kid.
  9. To be on a board of a non-profit organization.”

There they were, my life goals from my 20’s, staring up at me from the page.    

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Online dating scam – catfishing

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Ever been a victim of an online dating scam?  I have, twice.  A neighbor told me to watch the MTV show called Catfish and I would learn all about it.  I did and was shocked people could be so cruel.  The Urban Dictionary defines it as, “Having a fake Facebook profile, images and avatar in order to lure people to have romantic feelings.”  Read the following article from the NextAvenue.org website for more information.

Flood of Romance Scams Defrauds Older Victims

One recent case is a textbook example of a crook posing as a loving boyfriend

by Steve Bakerromance scams

September 26, 2016

“Behind the headlines about online romance scams victimizing older women and men lie true stories with real victims and perpetrators.

A recent case in point: Olayinka Sunmola, a Nigerian citizen operating out of South Africa who posted fake profiles on a variety of dating sites, including Plenty of Fish, eHarmony and Match, to lure women. When representing himself, he used the real pictures of other people, often masquerading as an officer in the U.S. armed forces. Sunmola claimed he was widowed with a child, and a practicing Christian with a strong faith.

Anatomy of a Scam

After finding victims online, Sunmola, 33, quickly moved them off the dating sites to communicate through Yahoo chat, and attempted to explain his slight accent by claiming he was originally born in Italy or Greece. He spent weeks or months developing relationships with his victims, many of whom lived in Missouri or Illinois. Sunmola often sent them gifts such as flowers or chocolates, and then asked for small sums of money for supposed minor emergencies in order to test the waters with them.

The women were convinced they had found their true love and soul mate. In most cases, Sunmola assured them that they would be married in the near future.”

Read more at http://www.nextavenue.org/romance-scams-defraud-older-victims/

C. Steven Baker recently retired as director of the Federal Trade Commission’s Midwest Region in Chicago, a position he has held since 1988.

Baby boomer generation retirement research

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Not Your Mother’s Old Age: Baby Boomers at Age 65

by Rachel Pruchno, Ph.D.

The Gerontologist (2012) 52 (2):149-152

“Nearly 79 million people now living in the United States were born between 1946 and 1964 (Haaga, 2002). In 2011, the first of the Baby Boom cohort reached age 65, and for the next 17 years, close to 10,000 people a day will celebrate their 65th birthday. The generation raised according to Dr. Spock, the generation whose motto once was ‘trust no one over 30,’ now find themselves knocking at Medicare’s door. Baby Boomers redefined each stage of life as they experienced it, modifying fashion design and hair length as well as key societal institutions. They questioned the underlying values and attitudes of society. They influenced education, music, race relations, sex roles, and child rearing. They are about to change what we know about old age.

The Baby Boom generation is significant for its size as well as its distinct social and demographic characteristics. Baby Boomers are more highly educated, more likely to occupy professional and managerial positions, and more racially and ethnically diverse than their predecessors (Frey, 2010). They have higher rates of separation and divorce, lower rates of marriage, and gave birth to fewer children (Hughes & O’Rand, 2004). On average, they are healthier and have longer life expectancies at age 65 (Freedman, Martin, & Schoeni, 2002; Manton, 2008). They have had more varied work histories, longer transitions out of the labor force, and work for more of their adult years (Quinn, 2010) than previous generations.”

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Making your retirement nest egg last as long as you do

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How to Avoid Going Broke in Retirement:  

Try these tips for making your nest egg last as long as you do

by Andrea Browne Taylor

May 4, 2016

“It’s no surprise that the biggest worry among retirees is running out of money. People are living longer than ever, yet pensions for life are a thing of the past. While you can’t guarantee your nest egg will last as long as you do, you can take steps to lower the odds of going broke in retirement.

If you’re already retired, spend less. Nearly half of retirees spent more in the first two years of retirement than they did just before retiring. A simple household budget goes a long way.

There are plenty of other things retirees can do to make their money last a lifetime. Take a look at even more ways to avoid going broke in retirement.”

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A clock chime…a loving remembrance

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dscn5404When my Dad retired in his mid-40’s, he received a mantle clock with a gold plate inscribed with his name, Jerry D. Oellrich, and the quote, “In Appreciation of Twenty-Five Years of Loyal and Valued Service to the Cargill Companies,” signed by the company president.  This treasured keepsake sat on top of the living room television in the farmhouse I grew up in.  He worked many long hours at Cargill working his way through the union ranks as a maintenance man and electrician to ultimately become a plant maintenance supervisor.  I looked up to my Dad.

In my freshman college composition class I was assigned to write a paper about whom I admired most.  I wrote about my Dad.  He was a hard worker and came from very meager means.  He was from a large, close family and he left high school before graduating to begin working full-time in a factory.  My Dad and Mom married and raised seven children together; all of them girls except the youngest.  He was also a farmer.  In my opinion, he had accomplished a lot with very little except hard work and determination.

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